The truth about the ransomware attacks in India

The truth about the ransomware attacks in India

Dostos and all horny couples across Bharata

I didn’t see that something like this could start killing us

Over the last two days very less people decided to book a couple friendly room in order to have babies, study anathomy together or read sharyaz to each other

We were concerned. Never before such scenario occurred in this company

We didn’t know what to do.

Even Praveen uncle fell asleep. The guy never sleeps. He is a vampire.

 

 

It was that serious.

So we came out and started asking, trying to find answers. Why all of a sudden Indian couples didn’t feel like having Ompaaaaaaaaaa Lompaaaa times.

And guess what the answer was?

Ransomware.

Yes. That puny hacker attack that scared thousands of people all around the world obviously took the vibe from the horniest nation in the world

This only proves one thing – That India indeed is full of engineers. And that engineering problems are still far more important than the problem of losing one’s virginity.

Praveen uncle didn’t show signs of waking up. So we thought of coming out of the close and clarifying things up

What is Ransomware

It is a malicious software designed to block access to a computer until a sum of money is paid

Glad we clear that up

How can you get ransomware?

By not using condom….Haaaaaaaa, kidding

First hint – you won’t get it as if you are getting measles. And it doesn’t spread via kissing or watching the same porn movie together

The primary mode of distribution of ransomware is email and infected and suspicions websites, mainly porn sites. Your are no stranger to these, right?

And yes, primarily email through the method widely known as Phishing.

You know what phishing is right?

So we made that clear too. You are more likely to get ransomware-d through an email rather than using a web browser while trying to book a hotel for couples from an innocent hotel booking portal like us 🙂

I mean, does this website look like a ransomware website to you?

 

The guy in the middle, with the green T-shirt? Does he look like a mastermind behind a potential ransomware attack?

He looks to me as if he needs a shot of glucose.

What about our email communications? Are our emails to you swarmed with fishing bites?

 

or this one:

 

 

These emails are lots of things. But definitely not phishing emails luring you towards ransomware infection

And here is a proof that the bad ransomware guys get pretty sensitive over South Asians. They just have it in themselves:

 

Therefore:

 

  • Ransomware spreads by triggering fishing attacks over email. Not from booking a hotel from an online hotel booking portal
  • The ransomware attackers tend to avoid developing countries. Too much customer support over too little gain, not worth bespectacled dude’s time

Catch up soon

blaze uncle
Meet the author / blaze uncle

Blaze Uncle is StayUncle's Chief Marketing Uncle in charge of telling StayUncle love stories over wrap of mumfali and beer.

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